Some of us have the feeling that something is wrong but we are not sure what it is or we know our life could be better. Some of us know that we have come from a difficult background and use coping mechanisms that can be destructive to ourselves or others.
Some of us are living with the effects of trauma, but do not realise that we are, and some are more aware and may find life to be overwhelming at times and find it hard to cope.
Many of us are out of touch with our true selves. One reason for this is that we learn to defend ourselves from the world at a very young age. Those defences become ingrained and we may think they are part of our personality. We may often dismiss our defences as ‘that’s just me.’
Defences are ingenious as they work by us not knowing that we have them. One of the most effective ways to resolve this is through counselling.
My name is Sarah and I am a fully qualified counsellor, based in Bournemouth, in the UK. I work online with Zoom or Skype.
I am an accredited member of the National Counselling and Psychotherapy Society. My accreditation is backed by the UK government through the Professional Standards Authority. My training and education meet standards set by those bodies.
Please see my profile at the National Counselling and Psychotherapy Society.
I am currently full and unable to accept new clients. Please check back later.
Please email me at email@example.com
Areas I Work In
I Can Help With...
A difficult childhood can be defined as one where one or both parents may have been in addiction or had a difficult childhood themselves that they never dealt with, they may have had anger issues and were frightening, or they may have been cold and critical and perhaps unloving. One or both parents may have been controlling and not accepting of their child’s wishes and/or character. There may have been a bereavement, a difficult divorce or a problematic step-parent.
This can be a stressful environment for a child to grow up in and can lead to all kinds of insecurities such as; feelings of not being good enough, feelings of being unsure of who they are, what they really want in life or a feeling that something is wrong but they are not sure what it is or they may have feelings of anxiety, be irritable, often feel stressed, be depressed at times or have frequent feelings of anger or frustration.
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Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Narcissistic Abuse
If your partner or parent can be cold, controlling or devaluing, be dismissive of you or your opinions, has never said sorry for anything, seems to be lacking in empathy, gives you the silent treatment and may go for days or weeks without speaking to you, if they lie a lot, or are manipulative and self-centred, if you get the feeling they think ‘it’s my way or the highway,’ if they are jealous and highly critical, if they are quick to anger and rage and if you feel you are never good enough – you may have a partner or parent with NPD.
A person with NPD can cause their partner and/or children to feel undervalued, belittled and ignored and it can have serious effects on self-worth and self-esteem. It can result in Complex PTSD, addictions, panic disorders, anxiety and depression amongst other outcomes.
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I work with Complex Trauma. The following can be symptoms of complex trauma (which can be caused by childhood abuse or having a parent who is in addiction, mentally ill or emotionally neglectful); irritability, depression, insomnia, feeling emotionally overwhelmed, having nightmares or flashbacks, feeling shame or worthlessness, panic attacks, substance abuse, eating disorders, chronic pain and feelings of not knowing who you are or feeling unreal.
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This is a simplified diagram of the mental structure of the mind of a narcissist. It is a complex system of defences which protect the
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