Latest Blog Posts

Chronic People Pleasing
People pleasers put others before themselves and consider their own needs last, if at all. Often, children are not permitted to be themselves, perhaps their parents are abusive or just do not accept their child for who they are. This results

Defence Mechanisms
There are many types of defence mechanisms which we utilise when feeling the need to protect ourselves. There are primitive and sophisticated methods of defence for the psyche. Some are so well hidden from our conscious mind we may have no

The Brain and Trauma
Swollen Amygdala A child living under traumatic conditions will develop a brain that is very biased to danger. This will last into adulthood. This is done through the amygdala which is the ‘smoke alarm’ and emotional centre of the brain. Brain

Symptoms of Trauma
Trauma survivors have symptoms of the trauma in their behaviours and thoughts, these are not their personality or character but are echoes of trauma. Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is mostly seen in those whose trauma occurred in childhood. When children

Healing from a Difficult Childhood
It can be hard to heal from a difficult childhood but it can be done. Healing is possible and takes place through: 1. Knowledge – read everything you can about psychological subjects which are relevant to you. Learning leads to: 2. Understanding – you

Chronic Shame
Children from difficult backgrounds will often have lots of feelings of guilt and shame. Sources of shame can be parents, siblings, school or wider society and this will be carried into adulthood and will often manifest as feelings of the self

How Does Counselling Work?
Often in life, we may feel that we talk but others do not really listen, or that we are not worth listening to and then we may keep our thoughts and feelings to ourselves. If we have come from a dysfunctional

The Fear of Abandonment
What is the Fear of Abandonment? A fear of abandonment is a deep-seated fear of being left by people that you are close to. This fear affects your thoughts and behaviours. It can be rooted in childhood from physical or emotional

The Effects of a Difficult Childhood
A difficult childhood can be defined as one where one or both parents may have been in addiction, have had a difficult childhood themselves that they never dealt with, they may have had anger issues and therefore were frightening, or they