Latest Blog Posts

Chronic People Pleasing
People pleasers put others before themselves and consider their own needs last, if at all. Often, children are not permitted to be themselves, perhaps their parents are abusive or just do not accept their child for who they are. This results

Treating Complex Trauma
Complex PTSD develops in response to chronic traumatisation over the course of months or years. The trauma can include emotional, physical or sexual abuse. There are exceptional circumstances in which adults can develop Complex PTSD, but it is mostly seen in

Why Some People Do Not Know They Have Trauma
We learn to defend ourselves from the world at a very young age. These defences become ingrained and we think they are parts of our personalities. We may often dismiss our defences as ‘that’s just me.’ Defences are ingenious as they

Understanding Anger
“The average adult experiences anger about once a day and becomes annoyed or peeved about three times a day.” What is Anger? Anger is one of our natural inbuilt ‘mammalian’ defences which is designed to keep us safe from danger. Anger

The Effects of a Difficult Childhood
A difficult childhood can be defined as one where one or both parents may have been in addiction, have had a difficult childhood themselves that they never dealt with, they may have had anger issues and therefore were frightening, or they

Symptoms of Trauma
Trauma survivors have symptoms of the trauma in their behaviours and thoughts, these are not their personality or character but are echoes of trauma. Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is mostly seen in those whose trauma occurred in childhood. When children

Defence Mechanisms
There are many types of defence mechanisms which we utilise when feeling the need to protect ourselves. There are primitive and sophisticated methods of defence for the psyche. Some are so well hidden from our conscious mind we may have no

Why We Self-Sabotage
Why Do We Self-Sabotage? Self-sabotage can be defined as acting in a way that is detrimental to both our well-being and to reaching our potential. Self-sabotage can be either conscious or subconscious and is expressed in our behaviours when we undermine

The Mental Structure of a Person with Narcissistic Personality Disorder
This is a simplified diagram of the mental structure of the mind of a narcissist. It is a complex system of defences which protect the conscious mind from the buried feelings of shame and rejection. The real wants and needs of