Latest Blog Posts

How Does Counselling Work?
Often in life, we may feel that we talk but others do not really listen, or that we are not worth listening to and then we may keep our thoughts and feelings to ourselves. If we have come from a dysfunctional

Why Some People Do Not Know They Have Trauma
We learn to defend ourselves from the world at a very young age. These defences become ingrained and we think they are parts of our personalities. We may often dismiss our defences as ‘that’s just me.’ Defences are ingenious as they

Structural Dissociation
The Structural Dissociation Model Dissociation is on a spectrum ranging from daydreaming to DID – Dissociative Identity Disorder (formerly Multiple Personality Disorder). Normal dissociation means to go onto automatic pilot when doing an activity (for example, when driving a car and

The Anger Iceberg
The Anger Iceberg reminds us that when we are feeling angry we are often protecting ourselves from other emotions. Anger is a useful tool as it is full of energy which helps us to act and it keeps others away from

Attachment Theory
Attachment theory deals with the relationship between the primary caregiver and the baby/child. Research has shown that attachment styles can be observed by the time a child is one year old. Attachment is the emotional bond we have with another person.

Transactional Analysis
Transactional Analysis was developed by Eric Berne who wrote the popular book ‘Games People Play‘. Ego States Berne posited that each individual possesses three basic ego states – the Parent, Adult, and the Child. These states represent a person’s internal model

Healing From Narcissistic Abuse
Those with Narcissistic Personality Disordered parents have a lot of healing to do, but it can be done. The defences that were built in childhood need to be carefully dismantled and replaced with the characteristics of assertiveness and confidence. Many people

Complex PTSD
Complex PTSD develops in response to chronic traumatisation over the course of months or years. The trauma can include emotional, physical or sexual abuse. There are exceptional circumstances in which adults can develop Complex PTSD, but it is mostly seen in

Chronic People Pleasing
People pleasers put others before themselves and consider their own needs last, if at all. Often, children are not permitted to be themselves, perhaps their parents are abusive or just do not accept their child for who they are. This results